I fell in love with someone i would've died for, the hardest most painful thing was walking away still madly on love with him.

So, its been 6 month since my breakup with him
and i still find myself thinking about him all the time,
constantly every moment
like when i wake up, when im showering, when im walking down the street, going to class, when i eat, when i go somewhere we used to go, or somewhere we've never been, and especially when listening to songs, like any song is relatable

and by that, i feel very lonely, very alone, i feel isolated
theres no one's with me in my world
there used to be you and i miss that :(
this feeling is taunting and agonizing
it hurts so much!!! :'(

and being me, not being able to express myself
*im really bad with words and expressing my feelings :(
make it more wounding

i figured out whats hurting me the most
its the fact that you never mourn for our split
you just straight away moved on with another love you can find
i feel like you deceived me all these time
i always question myself,
did you ever really loved me that much?

but i know you did
i know, i believe you really had loved me
its your action for the past 5 years

but doesnt it hurt when we breakup?
DOESNT IT?
if u ever did really loved me why doesnt it hurts you?
i dont get it
how could you throw away all that feeling you had for me and love another girl?
it took you less than a month! why?
and i see the way you treated her
i read everything
you treated her better than me
you seems really happy with her
all the sweet things you did for her,
the way you show her to the world,
all the compliment.
hmm

dont get me wrong
i do want you to be happy
i do want you to find other love better than me
but at least, take your time
its just not fair for me

idk. maybe it makes sense why we breakup in the first place.

still, on the 6th month
it hurts.



.